Pisalnica
*b*FIST CHAPTER *b*(pt.2)
*modra*TWs for this chapter:*modra*
drugs, bullying, hate speech and slurs, arguing, family issues, mentions of: selfharm, suicide, smoking
______________________________
*b*Olivia *b*
When I wake up the world around me is dizzy. I sit up carefully. Every inch of my body is hurting. I check the time. I was unconscious for about five minutes. I know that people have passed by in that time, but they simply didn't care enough or even if they did, they were too afraid of Max's anger to help me.
Max was always a bully, but he was also always very popular. He used to be Aiden's best friend, but after Aiden came out, Max completely cut him off and made sure noone wanted to be his friend. And when me and Azar accepted Aiden in our group and supported him, he started taking his anger out on me. He would of course love to beat up Azar or Aiden, I know it, but Aiden is too strong for him and is basically never in school. And Azar on the other hand is so praised by the teachers that he would immediately get in trouble if he would attack them.
So I am the only option left. Aiden and Azar did everything to try and protect me, but I simply don't give enough fucks, for it to actually change anything.
After I'm sure I won't faint again, I slowly stand up. I take a deep breath and start walking home.
***
Ten minutes passes and I'm infront of my house.
I don't even have to step in and I already hear my parents. They're screaming and arguing.
I sigh. Dad is in town again, I realize. I quickly take my shoes of and try to sneak into my room. Unfortunately father notices me as I try to get pass the kitchen.
"Oliva, hey!"
I turn around and pressure a smile on my face. Dad frowns. Great. He saw how beat up I am. He turns to my mum. I know he's gonna put all the blame on her. Before I know it he's back to screaming.
"Don't you see what's happening to our daughter?! She's all beat up! And you do absolutely nothing about it! She should be living with me! And you should be happy that I'm not suing you!"
Mum answers right away, she's not holding back:
"You don't think I tried?! I sent her to every teraphist in this fucking country and she still tries to fucking kill herself! She's a selfish bitch!"
I bite my lip.
"And you think she would be better at yours!? You're a drunk! Or did you forgot how you used to hit us both when you still lived here?!"
"I changed! Liv, tell her! Tell her you want to live with me!"
I know very well that he didn't change a bit. And even tho my mum doesn't give two fucks about me, at least she doesn't hit me all the time. But I really don't want to anger dad even more, so I try and carefully choose my words:
"Dad, listen. I would love to live with you, but I really don't want to move. I have all my friends here. I really don't wanna leave them"
Room goes silent for a second and all I can hear was dad's, heavy, angry breathing. Finally, he says:
"So, that's how it is." He turnes around and leaves the house. He shuts the door behind him.
After the first shock mum smiles at me. She loves pretending that everything is OK now, when I took her side. It makes me sick to my stomach.
"Thanks, sweetie. I really appreciate this," she starts.
"You know I didn't mea-"
"Just fucking leave me alone," I interrupt her. I go upstairs to my room and slam the door.
I know she ment it. She always thought that I was selfish for trying to kill myself. And she is kinda right. She really did everything she could, but I simply don't want to be helped. I don't see any future for myself. I just want to live on alcohol and drugs, self harm when I feel like it and eat bearly enough, till it kills me before I turn 25.
I'm not saying that she's a good parent. As much as my dad abused me phisicly, she did mentally. But this time she was right.
I throw my bag on the floor of my room. I was planning on looking for Aiden, but I changed my mind.
I take my jacket, and put cigarettes, lighter and my wallet in its pocket. Then I open a drawer under my table and reach for a small plastic bag, filled with white powder. I quickly close the drawer and leave the house.
_______________________________
Helja, se opravičujem ker je tako dolgo trajalo, ampak tule je naslednji del:)
*modra*TWs for this chapter:*modra*
drugs, bullying, hate speech and slurs, arguing, family issues, mentions of: selfharm, suicide, smoking
______________________________
*b*Olivia *b*
When I wake up the world around me is dizzy. I sit up carefully. Every inch of my body is hurting. I check the time. I was unconscious for about five minutes. I know that people have passed by in that time, but they simply didn't care enough or even if they did, they were too afraid of Max's anger to help me.
Max was always a bully, but he was also always very popular. He used to be Aiden's best friend, but after Aiden came out, Max completely cut him off and made sure noone wanted to be his friend. And when me and Azar accepted Aiden in our group and supported him, he started taking his anger out on me. He would of course love to beat up Azar or Aiden, I know it, but Aiden is too strong for him and is basically never in school. And Azar on the other hand is so praised by the teachers that he would immediately get in trouble if he would attack them.
So I am the only option left. Aiden and Azar did everything to try and protect me, but I simply don't give enough fucks, for it to actually change anything.
After I'm sure I won't faint again, I slowly stand up. I take a deep breath and start walking home.
***
Ten minutes passes and I'm infront of my house.
I don't even have to step in and I already hear my parents. They're screaming and arguing.
I sigh. Dad is in town again, I realize. I quickly take my shoes of and try to sneak into my room. Unfortunately father notices me as I try to get pass the kitchen.
"Oliva, hey!"
I turn around and pressure a smile on my face. Dad frowns. Great. He saw how beat up I am. He turns to my mum. I know he's gonna put all the blame on her. Before I know it he's back to screaming.
"Don't you see what's happening to our daughter?! She's all beat up! And you do absolutely nothing about it! She should be living with me! And you should be happy that I'm not suing you!"
Mum answers right away, she's not holding back:
"You don't think I tried?! I sent her to every teraphist in this fucking country and she still tries to fucking kill herself! She's a selfish bitch!"
I bite my lip.
"And you think she would be better at yours!? You're a drunk! Or did you forgot how you used to hit us both when you still lived here?!"
"I changed! Liv, tell her! Tell her you want to live with me!"
I know very well that he didn't change a bit. And even tho my mum doesn't give two fucks about me, at least she doesn't hit me all the time. But I really don't want to anger dad even more, so I try and carefully choose my words:
"Dad, listen. I would love to live with you, but I really don't want to move. I have all my friends here. I really don't wanna leave them"
Room goes silent for a second and all I can hear was dad's, heavy, angry breathing. Finally, he says:
"So, that's how it is." He turnes around and leaves the house. He shuts the door behind him.
After the first shock mum smiles at me. She loves pretending that everything is OK now, when I took her side. It makes me sick to my stomach.
"Thanks, sweetie. I really appreciate this," she starts.
"You know I didn't mea-"
"Just fucking leave me alone," I interrupt her. I go upstairs to my room and slam the door.
I know she ment it. She always thought that I was selfish for trying to kill myself. And she is kinda right. She really did everything she could, but I simply don't want to be helped. I don't see any future for myself. I just want to live on alcohol and drugs, self harm when I feel like it and eat bearly enough, till it kills me before I turn 25.
I'm not saying that she's a good parent. As much as my dad abused me phisicly, she did mentally. But this time she was right.
I throw my bag on the floor of my room. I was planning on looking for Aiden, but I changed my mind.
I take my jacket, and put cigarettes, lighter and my wallet in its pocket. Then I open a drawer under my table and reach for a small plastic bag, filled with white powder. I quickly close the drawer and leave the house.
_______________________________
Helja, se opravičujem ker je tako dolgo trajalo, ampak tule je naslednji del:)
Odgovori:
Zabaven odgovor
Najboljši odgovor
Super odgovor
Dober odgovor
Odgovor
Neprimeren odgovor
Nerazumljiv odgovor
super:heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes:
0
.jpg "Dekle we can do this")
Zabaven odgovor
Najboljši odgovor
Super odgovor
Dober odgovor
Odgovor
Neprimeren odgovor
Nerazumljiv odgovor
ahhh ne veš kako sem se veselila novega dela. res mi je všeč tvoj slog pisanja, pa tudi kljub temu, da sem že rekla, bom še enkrat povedala - zelo mi je všeč tema, ki si jo izbrala. se mi zdi, da zgodba ne dobi toliko prepoznavnosti tu, ker so vedno mlajši na pilu in tako težka tema ni zanje. ampak starejši med nami (predvsem pa tudi bolj zreli) pa zagotovo uživamo (upam, da ne govorim samo zase haha) tako da go on, ker me res zanima kako se bo odvilo, glede na to, da si omenila da si si blizu s temi temami in vem, da ti je jasno da zadeva ni rešena z enim obiskom pri psihologu :))
1
Hej, hvala, neveš koliko mi pomeni:)
Pa ja, vidim, da so tuka precej mlajši, zato bom pa tudi objavljala na Wattu.
S temami, pa ja sem si blizu in se mi je zdelo, da se veliko premalo o njih govori. Še posebej glede drog. Veliko prevelik je stereotip, da so ljudje, ki se drogirajo avtomatsko slabe osebe.
~Liv
Pa ja, vidim, da so tuka precej mlajši, zato bom pa tudi objavljala na Wattu.
S temami, pa ja sem si blizu in se mi je zdelo, da se veliko premalo o njih govori. Še posebej glede drog. Veliko prevelik je stereotip, da so ljudje, ki se drogirajo avtomatsko slabe osebe.
~Liv
ja... ker ljudje vidijo samo zadrogirano osebo, ki se vede čudno in je avtomatsko označijo za neodgovornega čudaka, nihče pa ne pomisli na razloge, ki so to osebo pripeljali v svet drog
Zabaven odgovor
Najboljši odgovor
Super odgovor
Dober odgovor
Odgovor
Neprimeren odgovor
Nerazumljiv odgovor
naednji del takojjj js zivim za to zgodbooo
0
luv u
Moj odgovor:
upsi
potrebuje pomoč ali nasvet v
Svetovalnica
skrbi zaradi zaključnega izleta
Hejj. Imam nekaj pomislekov in skrbi glede zaključnega izleta, ki se zelo hitro bliža in me skrbi in strah samo preganja. Naslednji teden gremo v gardaland na zaključni izlet, tam prespimo potem pa naslednji dan v dve večji mesti v Italiji. Kot prvo me skrbi, v tistem tednu pričakujem menstruacijo in ne vem kako bom tam z menstruacijo kot prvo imam take krče, da ne morem nič na momente, kot drugo dvakrat se mi je zgodilo, da sem od bolečin bruhala, tablete mi ne zaležejo protibolečinske itd. ne vem kaj naj delam, če bom imela tam krče, tudi vložka si ne bom imela možnost dosti menjavati še posebaj ne v gardalandu, veliko bomo hodili itd. sem prosila starše, če bi lahko ostala doma v primeru, da jo dobim, pa mi ne pustijo. Problem je tudi, ker imam zelo občutljiv želodec v zadnjem čau in mi hitro postane slabo... skrbi me, da bi mi bilo na avtobusu slabo, ker ne vem kako bom do tja se peljemo 10 ur pa še razmak med tema mestoma večjima za naslednji dan je 3 ure. Tablet proti slabosti mi starši ne pustijo. Problem je tudi, ker sem v sobi z eno najboljšo prijateljico in eno sošolko, ki je grozna pač morem biti z njo druge izbire nimam. Ni mi ok, ker je dostikrat bila pijana, kadi, pije energijske pijače... ne bom več naštevala. Ni mi ok, ker bosta ti 2 sošolki, ki bosta z mano v sobi šle na ful vlakcov smrti tam v gardalandu (blue tornado pa take) in si bosta verjetno zelo razdražle želodce in jima bo ponoči slabo jaz pa ful ne prenesem tega ok, ko nekdo bruha, ker še potem jaz. To bo grozen izlet, ne vem kaj naj delam noro me skrbi...
Upam, da dobim kak odgovor, hvala.
Upam, da dobim kak odgovor, hvala.
POIŠČI PILOVCA/KO
Pogosta vprašanja
POSVOJI ŠNOFIJA!
Priljubljene objave
Oglas
Zadnji odgovori
Nee :joy::joy: sm misla da bo neki drugega
